Recession: Time Stands Still

In every news story, paper and online, strings of words attempt to describe or predict the path of the global economic crisis. There are references made to a crisis similar only to the 1929 Depression. Now, although this is before my time the thought of such a time returning is frightening to say the least. The only reference I have of this time is a movie I viewed recently, Cinderella Man. The struggles the family will endure to survive in a time when resources and opportunity are limited to a select few. Well....

Time stands still for those who have felt an economic crisis all their life. And until the rest of the population has resorted to third world conditions then that is when I certainly will be in dire circumstances-or dead. Time stands still and I do not feel the loss of 'things' I've never had or wished to acquire. What keeps me up at night is the thought that it could get worse than it is right now.

I named this blog Poverty Reality because of comments by others who assumed through observation that they knew what it was like to live in, be born into, poverty. For the most part, I use it for a vomit bucket for those sickening moments to avoid diving into a abyss of self pity. I had to, have to, sift through so many invading thoughts that may be destructive. I am trapped at the moment and that may be a blessing in disguise considering the events going on around us. I need to get a job but now the only jobs that would be offered to someone like me are taken by highschool students and would not pay for our rent. I have a degree but it barely gets my foot in the door now. If only I could have back the last ten years and keep my mind from this moment. Poverty RE ality....there may be an economic crisis tightening the pockets of stangers that have thrived on the industries of sickness, crime, violence, need, misery....but the pockets are still empty of those that have held the strangers up...the impoverished. Here at the bottom we help each other. We smile at each other like we know, we understand, we belong. A Have Not status that is forced on us by the changing trends - expectations and tolerance. WE cannot understand why children with bloated stomachs still spray the saturday afternoon television programming when one person can be worth billions. WE want to help but have little to offer and what is available to give is deemed worthless...pitiful. So we share our bread with our neighbor as we watch the headless bodies pass on street corners holding tight their loaves.

An opportunity to share, live, and wake without shame that is all.

Have to get out of this house Now! I am afraid. Somethings coming. Change? No. Reveal.

Who cares?

I can see why there are so many people who are just plain tired of hearing the hard luck stories. In a short time I will no longer be on this earth. I will be dust and all my struggles now just doesn't or won't make sense. I am a spec on a spec that only my family will remember for a couple generations. I can only hope that what I am doing in my life now will help make the world a better place for my children and grandchildren, enough for them to pass it on to their children and grandchildren. A mother's love is insane. Why is it we live our day to ensure the life of a little one yet to be born is safe? The insanity is when we forget to live today with out children before time steals the moments away and the children are adults.

I am clammering at the sides of the bucket trying to get a grasp to get me out of this before my life is done. Live. LIve LIve LIve LIve LIve. damn it . Live